So, The Roomie is trying to detox to pass a drug test for a job. I think. I dunno.
She's used the usual methods such as lotsa Gatorade and trying to sweat it out. The illicit substance we're referring to is green and leafy, so I'm not sure how effective those methods are. My guess would be not very.
But she heard through the grapevine that if you drink a packet of pectin dissolved in water and wait an hour, for five hours afterwards you test clean. When going to the Walmart to find this pectin, she asked a black sales guy for its location. He then asked her if she was trying to get clean. She said yes, and the guy advocated pectin's abnormal use.
A black guy working at Walmart. I may be going to hell, but you'd think he would know, right?
For those of you who don't know, pectin is the jellying agent used in fruit preserves. When you buy it, its usually with the intention of making delicious jams and jellies.
But no longer. Maybe.
The Roomie had me mix up her Piss-Test-Deceiving cocktail as she was in a rush to get out the door. I did it gladly, mostly because the thought of someone choking down an entire packet of that stuff is a cruel thing, indeed. And I wanna see if it works. For purely academic reasons, you understand.
I'm sure I could skip the trial-and-error portion of this particular aspect of college life by asking my father, a toxicologist, if this could work, but I'm just not sure I like how that conversation would go.
"Hey, Dad! Yeah, I'm good. Listen, if someone has smoked a month and a half's worth of gange and needs to pass a drug test tomorrow, would drinking pectin help? No, no, this is for a friend."
Oh yeah. That would go well.
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