put your shirt back on

So, there is a writer at Cracked.com who is rather infamous for his brutally honest and unflinching examination of reasons why his life sucks and the things he can do about it. It can depress the hell out of you. However, he does give a reason for it.

"I figure there are a lot of people in the same situation who feel like they're alone. That's always the worst part about having a shitty life in your teens or 20s, feeling like everyone else in the world has it figured out but you."

However, this time around, he has taken it upon himself to remind us that there is a motherfucking silver lining, dammit.

5 Reasons Life Actually Does Get Better

The guy is brutally funny and doesn't mess around, but one of his sections resonated with me in a way that, if I had a heart or human feelings, I might call 'meaningful'.

He discusses freedom and how it never really computes for those who have yet to get out from under their parents' jurisdiction.

"Want to stay up until 4 a.m. on a Wednesday? Go for it. Want to eat straight whipped cream right out of the container? Have at it. Adulthood is being able to get into your car at 2 a.m. and just drive for no reason at all. It's growing past being dragged to Mom's church every Sunday and being able to decide for yourself what you want to believe. It's eating pie for supper. It's choosing your own friends and buying your own clothes. It's sitting three feet from the TV screen, just because you fucking can. It's watching a movie for no other reason than it has a lesbian sex scene with Natalie Portman."


I'm kind of a youngin', in terms of adulthood, but this is where my two-married-parents-w/-2.5-kids-in-a-stable-middle-class-home upbringing always rubbed me the wrong way. No matter how permissive and awesome your family and home life may have been, you're still living under someone else's rules. Your meals, your dress, your sleep schedule is theirs to dictate, and god help you if you rock that boat, you ungrateful brat.

Like I said, I have a lot less to bitch about than most people. I've been living the American Dream for my entire life, may God have mercy on my soul. But it wasn't by choice. Would I choose anything different? Hell no. But would I go back to it, now that I've left? Not on your life.

My parents both work, so they keep to an "early to bed, early to rise" mentality out of necessity. I do this too, when I work or have class. But on my off days, I usually succumb to my natural night owl inclinations and just pay for it that next Monday. But whenever I go home, I will get physically hoisted out of bed by no later that 10AM by my parents. Not because I have anything pressing to do, mind. But just because I am sleeping the day away, and that is something my parents cannot abide.

My parents and I get along great and our relationship has only gotten better over the years. But this is just one example of how some of the actions and values that they consider important are just meaningless noise to me.

When you end up on your own, there is a paradigm shift. All of a sudden, the structure your parents so painstakingly laid on top of you falls away and you are now free to do your own god damn thing, whatever that means. A lot of kids crash and burn, early on, because they no longer have anyone kicking them out of bed, each morning. But some, like me, manage to figure out that that mountain of laundry ain't gonna do itself, push up our sleeves, and start taking care of ourselves.

When I was younger, all I saw was the scary side of that, where there was no safety net. It was me against the world. Nobody ever told me that you come to like it that way.

I can, indeed, eat whipped cream any freaking time I want (finances permitting). I can and will go for late night drives for no reason. And I definitely sleep past 10AM. And I do it because it makes me happy and because I want to. I don't have to ask permission or plead my case for any of my actions. I have things I need to get done and I do them because I decide that they're important. I am not obligated to make anyone else happy or comfortable other than myself. And that if motherfucking freedom. And it is beyond cool to read the work of someone who agrees.

However, I am still unconvinced by the arguments that 'growing up' is necessary to keep said freedom. I'm pretty sure they're making that up.

Ahahaha, I love October!

I went thrift store shopping today to get supplies for my Halloween costume (Ash Ketchum) and while digging through some truly awesomely terrible clothes, I encountered...

( click for the horror )

I also had a reverse trick-or-treat for my residents, today. I wandered around and knocked on my resident's doors and threw candy, glowsticks, and fake vampire teeth at them. They were thrilled. I had a lot of fun doing it for them, and it was great seeing their faces light up. Us working 20-somethings don't get to trick-or-treat too often, anymore, and a lot of us miss it.

I have to work Halloween night, but I'm gonna be gorging on candy and horror movies that night, anyway, so its not so bad. And I'll be wearing my costume, uniform be damned.

Happy Halloween, folks!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BRO O' MINE.

Have lots of cake, play lots of video games, and live it up, you brat.
But keep in mind that if you outgrow me, I will never forgive you.

Just sayin.

2009, you're fired.
2010, you're hired!

January 1st means stories and memes!

So, last night at my place, we were having a small party. For this party, we ordered pizza, online. The delivery order asked us for the name of the location, and for any special directions. We replied that we were aboard the U.S.S. Enterprise, and that the delivery man should live long and prosper.
When the pizza arrived, the guy asked us who placed the order. We pointed to zece. The man then handed us our pizza, gave her the Vulcan salute, and left.

Best start of the new year, ever.

Okay! Memes!

( First Post of the Month Meme )

( Long-Ass 2009 Meme )


Let's do this.

Yesterday, I called my host mother, Muriel, at her home in France. I spent a goodly amount of time fighting with international calling protocols before the phone rang the way I wanted it to.

I only call her once or twice a year, so it's a real treat for us to talk to one another. She sends me postcards every few months, and I send her little gifts and card back.

She and I were talking, and she thanked me for all of my gifts over the year. My mother and I put together a little personalized calendar for her, filled with photos I've taken in France, Switzerland, Monaco, and America. But the present she loved the most was a pair of photos I e-mailed to her, months back.

The last time I was in New Orleans, I found a bistro right on Jackson Square called Bistro Muriel. I yelped and made my sister take shots of it, immediately. Muriel has American pen pals in Louisiana, but when she and I talked in France, she loved hearing about New Orleans. She wants to visit one day and see the Cafe du Monde and the Moonwalk for herself. So to find a bistro practically named after her, in the heart of the Vieux Carrie, was pretty amazing.
She told me that she had the pictures printed out and set up in her house.

I've sent her a lot of stuff, but it was really cool to me that she found that photo as cool as I did.

She also broke decorum and told me, in English, that she loved hearing from her girls every year, and that she was very happy when we called. Muriel has hosted three other girls, that I know of, including the Australian girl that I lived with for a few months, and she makes a point of keeping track of us, sending cards and little gifts. I don't know how typical this is, but I'm glad of it. The French are sometimes thought of as an aloof, haughty bunch, but when they think of you as family, you are going to be family until the day you die. I'm proud to consider Muriel and her clan a part of my family, and it was really kind of awesome to be refereed to as one of 'her girls.'

It was also funny to see my family's strange looks as I wandered around with the phone, babbling in somewhat broken French.

Even if I had issues with the day feeling like Christmas, calling home made things a little more awesome.

It's that time, again!



( Playlist and Lyrics )

DOWNLOAD HERE



The last song has to be heard to be believed.

Merry Christmas, if you're into that kind of thing.

Dear Non-Americans,

I'm pretty sure that the idea of Thanksgiving is strange to you. Those crazy Americans are celebrating a past meal their ancestors shared with the Indians, who were kind enough to share their harvest when our ancestors would have starved, that we later raped, pillaged, and plundered? Also, smallpox? Jesus Christ, America! The world was just getting over Bush!

Okay, guys, that's the demi-historical basis, sure. Just like Christmas is Jesus's birthday, when studies have placed his birth somewhere midspring.

So, that's out.

The Hallmark justification for Thanksgiving is to give thanks for everything you have. And if there's one thing people are good at, it's being content with what you have.

Uh-huh.

So here's my theory behind this bizarre holiday of no religious value. It's really about is eating WAY TOO MUCH food with friends and family. And it's the only true American holiday. There's no religious implications, no secular ideals or rituals, no special forms to fill out so you can miss school. It's something all Americans have in common. We live here. We may not have a lot, or we may have too much. We may have just moved here in the past week, or our ancestors may have crossed the Bering Strait to settle here, thousands of years ago.
Whatever, whoever we are, we're Americans. And we've all been given an excuse to revel in it.

But don't think this is just us. Every nation in the world has celebrations like these. You're not remembering some great battle or conflict. You don't have to go to church for it. It's just part of who you are, as a nation, and it's your chance to flaunt it and enjoy what it is to be who you are. It's a cultural holiday. I would not understand the depth of meaning behind it, but you sure as hell do, and that's enough for you.

So, to those beyond our borders, I wish you well in your own celebrations. And to one and all, Happy Thanksgiving.

Love,
Z

Valentine's Day, Singles Awareness Day, Bitter Singles Day, Quirkyalone Day, whatever.

I don't have to get it to wish you a good one.

2008, you're fired.
2009, you're hired!

And here are my New Years memes!

( First Line of the First Post, The Monthly Edition! )


( Long-Ass 2008 Meme )



'09, bitches. Bring it.

This god damned computer won't let me download House episodes.

Fucker.

My great aunt died today. Or maybe she was my great-great aunt. I never figured out the exact geneology other than that my mother, for as long as I could remember, called her and her sister 'the ancestors'.

Every time we went to Mississippi, we had to drive the hour into Jackson to see the ancestors. Ever since, you know, my birth, the ancestors had been there, and had been old. Thats just how it works.

Her sister, my grandfather's mother, known as Naneen, died two years ago. (so I guess my aunt was indeed my great aunt.) I got her car. And now Aunt Bootsie has died. I'm out of the country for the funeral.

The last time I saw the woman, she was in the hospital after a stroke. She couldn't really get words out around her immobile tongue and was no one I recognized. I was the only kid allowed to see her. She would have been 101 years old on June 5th.

I will never forget what my grandfather said after we'd (my mother, him, and myself) left the hospital.

"That, Dami, is what happens when you just live too damn long."

I've never been a sentimental person, and now is no exception. I don't even think my family is driving in for the funeral. We all started thinking of her as dead a long time ago.

I'm not sure what the point of this post is. Probably its me, feeling like I had to say something about her.

She's at peace, in a better place, no longer suffering, and would spin in her grave if she saw the House fanfiction that I have opened in another window.